What Tough Times Require

What Tough Times Require
By Pegine Echevarria

Everyone experiences tough times, that is just how it goes. How you react to those times can change how your team produces, how your family reacts to the situation and how you feel physically and emotionally.

Tough times can be described by an isolated issue (low cash flow) or a combination of issues (child in trouble, parents' ill, low cash flow, mergers at work. It is easy to fall into the trap of going into automatic pilot and reacting as you always have. The silent treatment towards everyone, the drama queen/king, the pity party whine fest, or perhaps the stoic martyr. None of these behaviors helps to resolve the issues, in fact they just make matters worse.

Each of the behaviors described above are driven by self centeredness. It is all about me, you see! The truth is the issues aren't about you at all. You and only you are making it about you. Too often people only focus on what is going wrong in their world and not about what is working right. The merger isn't about you...its just business. You child's trouble isn't about you,it's about him and his choices. Your parents' illness isn't about you, it's about their health and the communication clash is only about you because of your own behavior towards your spouse, you can't change them, only yourself.

So what can you do about tough times?

First, as my friend Jerry suggests 'focus on the water'. Jerry kayaks and he found that when he was in treacherous waters if he focused on the rocks he crashed, yet when he focused on the open water he avoided crashes. Focus on is working right in your life, at work, in your marriage, within your own child. What is working right, what are they doing well, what are their strengths. If you can't find any, ask someone to point the strengths and good things out. You may be too blocked to see them.

Second, take time to really appreciate what you do have. My 17 year old recently went to India for 21 days. During her time there she went with a friend of ours to a poverty stricken section in a small town. She came back transformed. Before she left she compared what she had with things her wealthier friends had. She realized all that she had, she realized all that Americans have and take for granted and she is different for it. How about you? Do you appreciate all that you have? Sometimes we get so busy looking ahead at where we are going that we forget to look behind from where we came.

Third, help someone get what you want. For instance, if cash flow is low then help someone's business make money by referring business. Need a car, find someone who needs transportation and help them. Help someone succeed.

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In this months e-zine you will find:

* Pegine's Thought of the Month

* Quote of the Month

* Try-its - Simple Steps for Magnificent Rewards

* Kick Butt Actions - Strategies to make an impact

* Have You?

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Pegine's Thought of the Month:

Tough times call for tough minds. You can choose where your mind goes negative and problems or positive and solutionsPegine Echevarria, MSWQuotes of the Month:Tough times are there so you can have a good time later on-- and really appreciate it!~Anonymous

Tough times never last, but tough people do~Robert H. Schuller quotes (American Reformed Church Minister, Entrepreneur and Author, b. b.1926

A leader, once convinced a particular course of action is the right one, must have the determination to stick with it and be undaunted when the going gets tough.~Ronald ReaganWomen should be tough, tender, laugh as much as possible and live long lives~Maya Angelou quotes (American Poet, b.1928)

Quotes come from http://en.thinkexist.com

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Try-its:

1. Recall a time when things were tough. Looking back did your drama, silent treatment, pity party or anger help you or the situation?

2. Recall a story that you read about or that someone shared with you about a tough time they went through. Was it worse than what you are going through now? Did they survive and succeed? Will you?

3. Recall a time when you just knew you were alright even though things didn't look that way. Know that you are alright right now.

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Kick-butt actions:

It is time to stop the drama, silent treatment, pity party or anger. It isn't serving you and it isn't serving the situation. Here are some kick butt actions that you can take right now.

1. Call for information. If there are cash flow issues, call your bill collectors and ask what your options are, call clients to ask how you can increase your business. Call you parents' physician and get the true low down of what is going on, go with them to their doctors' appointment. Call car dealers and call friends and ask if they know of someone who is selling a car in your price range.

2. Meditate or pray. Pray to whoever is your God or Higher Power. I have a friend who doesn't believe in God but he does believe in the power of his friends. He prays to the power of his friends. He know the group gives him solutions and kudos in both good and bad times, so he prays to that power. Whatever works for you, prayer takes you out of being alone and moves you into a 'we' situation. Just know that you are not alone in this situation.

3. Make a list of your issues on one side and solutions on the other. Be outrageous in the solutions. It is in the solutions that you find your answers.

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Have You?

* Ridden a motorcycle and felt the excitement of the wind rushing your face and body?

* Taken a boogie board or surf board and ridden a wave?

* Jumped into a pool with all of your clothes on?

* Kissed a baby's cheek?

* Made a cashier smile when it looked like they were having a bad day?

* Ever told your significant other how important they were to you and how much you would miss them if you were without them?

Take time to do these things. It will make a difference in your life.

Empowerment guru Pegine Echevarria, MSW and her company, Team Pegine, transforms organizations by empowering people. You might also be interested in Pegine's networking article called, Go Fish: For Friends, Business and Opportunities, to receive a copy simply sign up for her free ezine at http://www.pegine.com Her newest book is Sometimes You Need To Kick Your Own Butt: Strategies for Your Success Pegine appeared on CNN, MSNBC, ABC, CBS, NBC talk and new shows.

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